40 Days

Our newly re-elected governor took on the media late yesterday to blast them for making such a big deal out of the rain in Oregon. As he said, it has been raining in Oregon since time began. Why should that be the second story on a national news telecast? (TV Producer: Um, because of the flooding at the coast, two missing people, nearly-drowned cows, evacuated homes, and millions of dollars in damage, duh. That's news, Baby!)

Narrator: So Noah began to build the ark. Of course his neighbors were not too happy about it. Can you imagine leaving for the office at 7 AM and seeing an ark?
Neighbor: (enters whistling) Hey! You over there.
Noah: What do you want?
Neighbor: What is this thing?
Noah: It's an ark.
Neighbor: Uh huh. Well do you mind getting it out of my driveway? I've gotta get to work.
Noah: [ignores him, continues sawing]
Neighbor: Hey listen, what's this thing for anyway?
Noah: I can't tell you, ha ha ha.
Neighbor: Can't you even give me a little hint?
Noah: You want a hint?
Neighbor: Yes, please.
Noah: How long can you tread water? Ha ha ha.